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RTFM (Read The Fucking Manual) – Part 2

In this post over here, I talk about writing your own user manual. I actually heard about the idea from Cunning Minx who runs a polyamory blog and podcast called Polyweekly. I believe writing your user manual is a fantastic idea. So I decided that I will use it as a tool in one of my future relationship workshops. When …

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Graduation Advice To Myself

I was sitting in front of my computer trying to decide what I am going to write on today. I have a bunch of topics lined up that I really want to talk about. So I was going back and forth planning to write either about boundaries or my user manual. When I couldn’t make up my mind, I checked …

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Leaning into an edge

This is a very personal post today. I am currently leaning into an edge that I was not aware of in the past. I recently became aware of all the baggage I carry around with me surrounding it and I am writing a little about said baggage in this post. I am a recovering Nice Guy. I have done a …

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Jealousy (And 9 Steps To Deal With It)

I believe there are very few adults out there that have not experienced jealousy at one time or another. And we have so many expressions for it: “The green eyed monster”, “like a cancer in the bones”, “jealousy is a disease”, “a jealous woman is a faithful woman”, etc. The list goes on. And it’s all just trying to express …

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Let’s Talk Condoms

Yes, I know, it’s a topic that has been discussed a lot. So I won’t bore you with the effectiveness stats and proper use and whatnot. What I want to look at today is the difference in material, thickness and size that you can find. This is a conversation that came up during one of the last open relationship discussions …

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Why Is There No Manual For You?

In an upcoming workshop on relationship communication I am going to talk about writing our own “user manual”. There are several reasons why I think this is a) an important exercise and b) an important communication tool. In this post I am just talking about the why and give you some tips on the how and in a post down …

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A Curveball Reminder

What happens when life throws you a curveball? All my business coaches and teachers always repeated one mantra: It isn’t about how many times you get knocked down, it is about how many times you get back up and keep going. I know this mantra by heart. I agree with it fully. And I have not followed it. I don’t …

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Up And Down The Ladder (Of Abstraction)

My grandmother always advised me never to walk under a ladder because it brings bad luck. And I watched enough cartoons to know that you usually end up with a bucket of paint over your head if you don’t follow grannies advice. While I didn’t make any special effort to avoid ladders, there is one I never saw coming and …

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The Practice Of Relationship

Do you have something that you do regularly in a mindful way even if you don’t feel like doing it? Maybe you know this moment: You f***ing HATE doing what it is you are doing but you know it also feels really good on some level and you know it is good for you and halfway through doing it you …

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Dating 1 (of 3)

As promised in my last post I outlined my first evening lecture/meeting/discussion group on dating and, also as promised, I am sharing the information here with you. We live in a society that tells us we are broken somehow if we are single. So we throw ourselves into a relationship or marriage just so we can feel normal in the …